Writelike Mary Shelley: Frankenstein's monster's lament

For this second draft, we'll look again at each fragment of the original snippet, but this time we'll highlight some distinctive word choices and turns of phrase and show how we might incorporate these into our examples.

This process is fairly open-ended: how you respond depends on what you've already written, so feel free to look for your own ideas in the snippet and go in your own direction.

The big thing to keep in mind is intensity: this is not just someone having a whinge, this is a cosmic-scale lament.

To get this Gothic Romantic intensity, Shelley uses heightening and compression.

Heightening

Part of the intensity of this snippet is created through heightened word choice in the form of intense emotional words.

Compression

The other half of the intensity is created by eliminating filler words, either by simply cutting them out, or by tuning phrases so that the filler words disappear. 

With those two themes in mind, let's do a voice pass!