Science fantasy worldbuilding in Phoenix 5: Exotic technology

Exotic Technology

Checkpoint

This checkpoint piece can appear in Peer Review and Wrotevote, and be graded by a moderator.

Let’s pull all these fragments back together and see what we have. Here’s the original snippet:

It was a thick black disc, blacker than black, like a chunk of outer space. It was made from some kind of metal that looked like it had fallen from the sky. It felt cool to the touch, and though it was as big as both his hands cupped together, it was very comfortable to hold.

There were no words on it. But around its circumference were faint markings, intricate patterns. Twelve symbols, like a long-forgotten alphabet, carved into the black.

He couldn’t take his eyes off them. He didn’t recognize them, but just looking at them made his skin tingle. They looked ancient. They looked mystical. They looked almost alive.

And within this circle of symbols lay other, smaller circles. A series of dials, like wheels within wheels, tracing elegant arcs and crescents, describing a geometry as precise as it was mysterious.

PhoenixS.F. SaidSource

Here are the examples we've been building:

Let’s create a checkpoint piece. You can either revise and polish your work from this lesson (we’ve pasted it below) or you can write something completely new. (Your teacher may have a preference).

We’ve highlighted a high-level structure in the snippet, but within that you should try to include:

  • An introduction to the object through its physical form
  • A point of interest that tells the reader how it's different to what you'd expect
  • The character's reaction to the object
  • A further point of interest that builds on what has previously been revealed
Your turn

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